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giddyundertakerINVENTORY
Things Kept
Cracked Spectacles
Whoever wore these must be really, really, REALLY nearsighted.
(Sneakily obtained from Gaius. The crack is on the left lens, and it almost perfectly lines up with the scar on the Undertaker's face...)
(Sneakily obtained from Gaius. The crack is on the left lens, and it almost perfectly lines up with the scar on the Undertaker's face...)
Sotoba…?
A wooden plank commonly used as a grave marker in Japan. This one seems more solid and sturdy than the others… Better quality wood, perhaps?
50. Corkboard
A small bulletin board with some pins stuck into it! Perfect for making intricate displays about how everything’s connected, or about non-existent workers in the building you work at.
25. Bathrobe
A cheap deep red bathrobe, for when you want to look classy in your study but you just aren’t the kind of person with money for things like “a study” or “books” or “quality fabric.”
04. Hand-Made Paper (x2)
Just a loose stack of really fancy bespoke paper! To make those letters you write in case of your death really pop, you know?
61. Radio Play (x2)
A Fontaine Futuristics Accu-Vox recording featuring part of a serialized adventure.
(One obtained from Obi, one obtained from Joy. May have been repurposed...)
(One obtained from Obi, one obtained from Joy. May have been repurposed...)
68. Otamatone
The future of music is now!!! Beep.
08. Malört (x2)
A bottle of a foul-tasting liquor produced and distributed exclusively in Chicago, Illinois. It’s literally named after wormwood, if you don’t like strong and bitter alcohol you’ll probably have a bad time.
43. “Extra-Large Spice Grinder”
It’s. It’s just a full-on Medieval-style mace.
12. Live Bait
A styrofoam cup just… full of worms. In case you want to go fishing, or pull a really mean prank!
37. Do-It-Yourself Mime Kit
A very fancy makeup kit! All in shades of white and black. If being a mime isn’t your thing, it might Miraculously help you fit in with a different group of people…
55. Pep Bar
Sort of a combination energy and candy bar? Guaranteed to put a pep in your step!
45. “Social Distancing Device” (x2)
A six-foot-long staff, with a pointed blade at the end. Yep, it’s a spear! Has all the powers of a spear, too. Like stabbing.
(Obtained from Jonathan.)
(Obtained from Jonathan.)
Blank Accu-Vox Tapes x2
A Fontaine Futuristics Accu-Vox straight from the department store! There were barely enough for everyone, so he only took two.
20. Blobfish Kigurumi
No one asked for this. No one needed to bring this into the world.
(And yet he got one from Seo...)
(And yet he got one from Seo...)
48. Incredible Soaking Device
A water gun! Surely you will all be very responsible with this.
59. VILE-Brand Pen (x2)
A souvenir waterproof pen with the acronym VILE on it. Great for signing checks!
60. Toy Car
A small, RC car! Race them around!
18. Wizard Hat
A big pointy blue and silver hat! For commanding mystical energies, or maybe just looking like a dork.
07. Nisse
A stuffed friend for the holidays, or really any other time of the year - Gaze upon it, love it, take it home.
22. Weirdly Specific T-Shirt
Hang on, how many people does this actually apply to? Also it’s like size XXXL.
(Obtained from Seo, mistaken for night gown)
(Obtained from Seo, mistaken for night gown)
Things to Give Away
57. Atlas Shrugged
A hardbound copy of Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand! Makes for poor reading, but fantastic kindling!
56. Stuffed Big Daddy (x2)
A stuffed toy shaped like… a huge man with a drill for a hand? Don’t worry, he’s soft!
31. Hand Bra (x2)
Who the heck left this in here? It almost seems like it belongs in a whole other world.
11. Non-Descript Golden Man Award
A gold statue of a blank man, sized to be held in one hand! A sign on the bottom says it’s for… Best Grandma? Unfortunately it’s not even made out of gold, it’s just gold-painted bronze.
68. Otamatone
The future of music is now!!! Beep.
Hair Ornament
A woman's hair clip sporting a lovely, round stone and tassel. It was won in a martial arts tournament.
43. “Extra-Large Spice Grinder”
It’s. It’s just a full-on Medieval-style mace.
35. Plastic Mask (x2)
For when you want to look… Handsome.
Things Lost
13. A Gallon of Seawater (x2)
Literally just some seawater spills out onto the floor from the mouth of the vending machine. Why this?
(Did not come with a container to put it in, unable to collect. What a waste.)
(Did not come with a container to put it in, unable to collect. What a waste.)
30. I Can’t Believe it’s Not Margarine!
A single stick of unsalted butter. Better refrigerate it.
(Used to make biscuits.)
(Used to make biscuits.)
67. Lemon (x2)
This is a lemon.
(Delicious.)
(Delicious.)
34. Charlie Pants
A doll of a just wildly creepy-looking clown.
( Thrust upon Misfire to be used for target practice. )
( Thrust upon Misfire to be used for target practice. )
YARD SARD 7/20
Date: 2022-06-20 04:53 am (UTC)35. Plastic Mask: For when you want to look… Handsome.
34. Charlie Pants: A doll of a just wildly creepy-looking clown.
56. Stuffed Big Daddy: A stuffed toy shaped like… a huge man with a drill for a hand? Don’t worry, he’s soft!
31. Hand Bra: Who the heck left this in here? It almost seems like it belongs in a whole other world.